Judgement/Judgment

• It is interesting that in the not so recent past judgment was generally viewed as a positive character trait whereas nowadays it is seen in a negative light. Perhaps the difference lies in the level of consciousness present when we exercise judgment. In its positive manifestation, sound judgment involves a conscious focus that is needed to discern the proper course of action among choices. Done this way judgment tends to incorporate a view broader than ourselves and acts in accord with a common good. But when consciousness is lacking, so is discernment. Our judgments are on auto-pilot, passed either totally unconsciously or out of an unquestioned self righteousness. A telltale sign is the absence of heart in our response. It is easy to spot someone operating this way and we label them as ‘judgmental’. On some occasions we note it with humor and at other times disparagingly or with disappointment. Of course we are blind to our own behavior in that regard and at various levels we are all guilty of exactly such actions. Not surprisingly spiritual teachings admonish that we ‘judge not’. An yet there are times when life demands that we make judgment calls of the highest order. Should it befall us, may we be able to do so consciously. Sound judgment involves a setting aside of the ego which in many ways is synonymous with the negative aspects of judgment. The ego is in fact the one who judges, and does so out of a very limited perspective. Wisdom teachings hold that compassion is the antidote for judgment of this debilitating kind. The truth is … the ego cannot be present when compassion exists. Compassion is a quality of our more noble self and when experienced means in that moment we have transcended our egos. If by grace we find ourselves in such a sacred place, we can render judgment of a pure and wise nature.
• Our minds judge what they cannot understand, what they cannot integrate, what they see is “other” or “out there.” We judge the pieces of ourselves that we have not come to appreciate for their giftings. We ask the question, what circumstances or perceptions created this part and go deep inside staying with the feeling generated in our discomfort and searching. By slowing the process down, bringing piece by piece into the unconditional love and compassion of the heart with awareness and breath, we find the gifts of the parts of others and ourselves that we disowned or could not accept. In acceptance and compassion for self and others we are brought back to love. There is no there out there; there are no parts of ourselves that are not sacred. As this process is repeated over and over again as many times as it takes a silk handkerchief to flatten a granite mountain, the mind becomes quiet and still. As it is transformed from the bucking bronco into stillness, the mind becomes subservient to the heart and can be useful when called upon. The heart is primary.
• If forgiveness is the art of healing oneself through another, then judgement is its compliment. Judgment is the art of knowing what is calling for forgiveness.
• Judgement is always an addition to what IS. What is is just what is, and never means anything. Existence just IS. People say and do what they say and do, life is the way it is and all the rest is our addition. The addition we make, the meaning we add, is hugely impactful, but not nearly as impactful as the context from which it emerges. If my friend breaks his promise and my judgement is, “He’s not as good as he should be!” then I will automatically be pulled to either try to make him “better,” or to criticize him overtly or covertly, and so on. More impactful on life and myself than that specific judgement is the context Should/Shouldn’t Be. All of life then lives for me as something that either should or a shouldn’t be, and it is never just the way it is. My actions, my emotions and my thinking are all then given by whatever follows automatically from things being as they should/shouldn’t be. I am either resisting them, or trying to make everything else like them, or trying to hold onto them. In any case, I’m never in relationship with things just as they are, and I am never the conscious AUTHOR of life. Therefore, when I judge another, it’s not just that I judge someone and that is itself “bad” or “harmful.” It is that who I become when I judge another is someone whose Self and whose Life are ALL inside of the context of that judgement: good/bad, or right/wrong, or Should/Shouldn’t. Then that is my life, and that is who I am, and nothing outside that context is possible. I am trying to get life and people and myself to be the way they should be, and I’m never just having them be whoever they are and creating whatever matters to me. At the same time, when I can distinguish not just a particular judgement, but the background context giving that judgement as the meaning I have added to Life, as distinct from the way Life is, then in that moment I am no longer given by that judgement or context, and I am just a space in which life occurs. So judgement can either close a door to what’s possible, or be my doorway into that space. Judgement is nothing in and of itself. It’s how judgement lives for me that give me my access or lack of access to experience life and other people, and to create purpose for my life and me.